February 07, 2005

...A Day to Forget

I was so glad when I woke up this morning to find myself at the beginning of a new day that I actually thanked God for making our days only 24 hours. All this because yesterday was one of the most trying days ever with Max. He's two. He usually has great days and is in good spirits most of the time...but yesterday...yikes!

Before I start my story - I want to tell you that I don't mean to compare the trivial things that I dealt with yesterday to the horrible and tragic situations that many people go through everyday...I am not that insensitive and naive...but can I just blow this one thing out of proportion and make as big of a deal as it felt at the moment?

Yesterday was Sunday and Sunday mornings are difficult for me anyway. I teach sunday school at our church and I have to get all the kids up, cleaned up, fed, dressed and out the door by myself by 9:15. (Sam leaves for church early) Some days it is as smooth as butter, others feel like I am caught in a chaotic whirlwind of arguing, fighting and nagging. Yesterday started out rough, Savannah got a spanking and nobody seemed to be moving as fast as I thought we needed to. (I totally take the blame for a huge lack of patience as well). We got to church on time, but due to our rough morning I was seriously thinking of going home after sunday school because I didn't want to be there.

I stayed anyway...after church there was a dinner we attended. The tables were decorated with red and white balloons which proved to be very attractive to my kids. We headed home accompanied by six balloons. The boys fell asleep on the way ( I knew they would) so when we got home it was my mission to get them into bed so they could continue their naps. (Time: approx. 1:40) Max was still clutching his balloon strings in his hand when I got him out of the carseat and by the time we got in the house he was awake enough to inform me that he was not giving them up. Rather than be firm and insist the balloons stay out of the room, I gave in hoping that he was tired enough to just fall back asleep. BIG MISTAKE! Karson went right to sleep - or maybe never woke up and after Max was tucked in bed (with the balloons dangling over his bed) I closed the door and made a dash for my bed. Crawled in and fell asleep in an instant.

Around 2:30 I was awakened by a strange bump-bump that I couldn't quite understand. Then thinking I heard Max, I went out into the landing and saw Max and his balloons bump-bumping down the stairs, and then Karson started crying. Max was distracted by the balloons and I assume he never actually went to sleep. I tried to get Karson back to sleep. He cried for a half hour and then I went and got him up as well.

OK. It's 3:00 and all the kids are awake. They usually sleep until at least four. Max's afternoon was one battle after another. Throwing tantrums and crying, so by 4:30 I decided he needed to just go back up to his room. I didn't really care if he slept at that point, I just wanted some peace! When dinner was ready we got him up and he cried because he wanted to sleep. When he came downstairs he cried because he wanted bubble gum balls instead of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. I had been planning to take the kids to the grocery store later and it was about at this point that I decided that we could not possibly attempt our shopping trip with Max acting this way. I should have stuck to this, but within an hour he snapped out of it and was acting very pleasant, ate his dinner and was playing.

About 6:30, the temptation to kill some time at the store became too great and we got ready to go. We went to Walmart and Max had his first meltdown at the bottle returns. He couldn't put the bottles in as fast as Savannah so he got mad. I tried to distract him throughout the store, once we were shopping, with "let's go find some Goldfish" or asking him to pick which box of yogurt to buy. It worked until we got to the canned fruit and vegetables aisle. Max found jello that he absolutely thought I must have in my cart. When I refused and placed it back on the shelf he fell to the ground crying, thrashing about. I tried everything - nothing worked. He really needed to be disciplined for acting this way and being defiant to me, but I am so hesitant about doing that kind of thing in public places because you never know how people will interpret things.

So anyway, I tried to start walking away which usually works - except this time. We went around the end of the aisle and he was still laying there. I peeked around the corner to see if he was following us - no way. When other customers started to head down the aisle, I just went and picked him up, kicking, and plopped him in the seat with Karson - feet hanging out, and now Karson was screaming. I had to get out of there, and I was practically racing to the front of the store to reach the check out. I ordered Savannah to start loading the groceries on the conveyor thing and Max wanted to help. But he was no help. He got a hold on his Shrek Gogurts and wouldn't give them up. Down on the floor he went, in the middle of the lane. I tried, to no avail, to convice the cashier that my son was just having a bad day and my kids are not normally like this, but she seriously just looked at me like, "yeah, whatever...I know what kind of mother you are."

I was so embarrased to be seen with my kid so out of control and thought back to all those times I have seen mothers with their kids in a store and wondered what was wrong with them and why can't they control their kids. So there I was. I wrote my check and got the hell out of there. I love my son to death, but days like this drain all the energy from me. I am so glad they only happen once in a while and I am praying that the next time God thinks I need a challenge like this, He will help me have more patience than I did yesterday.



I don't really have an image to post with this story, but here is Max having one of his meltdowns - Sunday after church, getting our picture taken for new ID tags for the kids...I am sure you can understand why we didn't take the time to try to get a decent picture. But now we all have to wear this horrible picture every Sunday!

2 Comments:

Blogger moi said...

I'm sorry, I had to LAUGH at your post! I have 4 kids, youngest is now 18, and I HAVE BEEN THERE. All 4 are wonderful, mature, people now.

One thing I noticed after a day like you had: the child with the temper turned out to be coming down with something. Hope your little one is fine.-- Lori

2:54 PM  
Blogger ste-pha-nie said...

I have also been there - more than once! Last year I kept only one of my New Year Resolutions: NEVER go grocery shopping with the boys, unless it's and in and out errand to pick up milk for example. I know it's not always practical... but when you can, oh!
Hope the rest of your shopping trips are much much nicer.

5:49 PM  

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